Tuesday, May 08, 2007

Bummed Out

Like the new layout?

The weather is beautiful outside. It is finally warm enough to leave the hoodies in the closet today. I really should be out there, enjoying the weather, walking the streets of downtown Toronto, but nah, I'm really not in a good mood, and I haven't been for a week now. I always go through these moments, where I feel like I'm not so sure of everything around me. I'm still trying to figure that part out. A number of things, my family is pissing me off, and I'm so unmotivated to go to work. That's the word, un-motivated. I feel like there's just nothing out there for me. What's funny is that I'll go through these moments, mope around, and within a few days, I'm back to normal.

We watched Spiderman 3 in IMAX on Sunday. I'd never been in an IMAX theatre, it was enormous! I only regret not watching 300 on that IMAX screen, what a waste. The movie was 'ok'. I've always liked Spiderman, but, there's something about Tobey Maguire, I can't pin-point it. I guess I was expecting more 'action' than 'lovey dovey' stuff.

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Tuesday, May 01, 2007

Sweating = Good. Fighting = Bad.

No. We didn't 'party-it-up' last Friday. I'm such a kill-joy. Don't get me wrong, I was really gung-ho about it. The plan was to chill at Jo's place, drink & smoke, and head out to the party. But, as it turns out, I drank & smoked too much, when it came time to go out, I was just dead tired, and ripped. Besides, I had to work the following afternoon anyway, I think if I had gone out, I would've been dead at work.

So here I go again with the fitness thing. Yesterday, Mom was bugging about how all her old Jane Fonda workout videos are gone, either they're missing or they've just been so used that the quality of the video is horrible. I told her how I saw some re-released DVD's of hers at Best Buy, she got so excited she wanted me to go get it. Of course, being the wonderful daughter that I am, I bought it for her, not just one, but two. Plus, I managed to get something for myself, Tae Bo cardio. I thought it would be nice to add to my exercise collection, since all of them are just about toning and none for cardio. This morning I popped Tae Bo in the DVD player, and my God! I swear I've never seen myself sweat profusely! It was hardcore-nonstop action. I was literally running out of breath. And because it was my first time, I didn't do all the moves to it's highest degree, I figured I'd take it easy for a bit and then go all the way. I know I've said this before, but, I think this time I really need to committ myself to this, it'd be a good idea since I think I'm already 20 pounds overweight. Ouch.

Last night Jo and I had a fight. Very unusual. We were both cranky and tired and it just got the best of us. That morning Jo asked me if I'd like to come video tape his bowling so he'd analyze it later one. I really didn't want to, but I said sure, since he said I could take the car home. Fast forward to that night, I really couldn't video tape him since all kinds of people we walking around, blocking my view, and I wasn't about to go down into the bowlers area to sit there and tape him, I just wasn't in the mood. Not in the mood for anything, even the common chit-chat. Mind you, for us, the bowling alley is like the red carpet. When you come in, everyone stops to say 'Hi' and catch up on things. Even when you're spectating, people are still approaching and giving kisses on cheeks and what not. Don't get me wrong, on any other given day, I really don't mind it, it's always nice to see familiar faces, but today, I just didn't give a fart. I told Jo from the moment I picked him up that I was hungry. So we made plans to eat after bowling. During league though I got so bored, I upped and left for the mall (that's when I bought the Jane Fonda DVD's). I came back and they had one more game left. As soon as he was done his game, he chatted a little and I motioned for him to go. We left, and in the car we were back and forth about where we were going to eat. I said it really didn't matter, I just needed something in my stomach. So, long story short, we ended up at McDonalds, then a Sushi place, and finally Wendy's. At Wendy's he blew up, he wondered why I couldn't make up my mind about where to eat. (Let me clear things up first...He drove into McDonalds asking if it was ok, I said it was fine. He asked if I was sure, and knowing that there was a Wendy's just down the street, I said I'd rather have that. So he spotted a sushi place, he drove in, 'coz I know he'd rather have sushi, they were closed. We ended up at Wendys...)I told him already that I didn't care, and I didn't understand what all the big fuss was about. Then he yelled and said some shit like, 'I don't even want to eat, I wanted to bowl some more.' That was it, I blew up too. I yelled back and I told him he should've told me, then I wouldn't have waited for him because I knew he'd want us to eat together, I would've grabbed my own food while he was bowling, and that I was just thinking about him. Now that I was crying I told him I wasn't hungry anymore. He replied by saying he'd had enough of my games. Shit. I told him I wasn't fucking playing games with him. He asked me again what I wanted, and I said I wasn't hungry. He backed out of the drive thru and we drove in silence until we exited the highway. He parked the car by the curb, and suddenly he was apologizing. He said he should not have yelled at me, and he just lost it, and he was sorry. I told him not to worry about it, and I told him he should've told me he wanted to stay, because if that was the case then I would've jumped in the car, grabbed some eats and eat at the alley. Plain and simple. Anyway, we ended up with McDonalds at 10:30pm.

These are the kind of fights Jo and I have, usually something stupid but it rarely ever happens. I'm glad for that because I had fighting with him. I hate fighting period. We were pretty much ok by the time we got home, and that's always the case, when we fight, it usually doesn't last for more than an hour, thank God.

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Friday, April 27, 2007

School's Out!

Thank God it's Friday! What's even better is that school is out! But why out of all days, does it have to rain today? Jo and I were gonna party-it-up tonight, and I hate going out when it's raining, it just ruins my mood, always.

Upon finishing this semester, there are a few things I need to take care off, life management stuff, sheesh. Why do things have to be so complicated?!

A. Have to speak with payroll dept. at work for tax related stuff.
B. Pay off student loan.
C. Pay off my laptop.

Hmm. I guess that's about it. I think I'm in for a pretty boring summer. No trips this year. Jo and I are planning to visit the Philippines next year, so I have to save up for that. So much for the Europe backpacking trip :( It's either/or. Can only do one. Totally sucks.

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Wednesday, April 11, 2007

2007 Recap

I'm really looking forward to updating 'Media'. I've seen a ton of movies in the last few months, a lot of shit ones and really good ones, safe to say that I am now an official Leo DeCap. fan!

Otherwise, things have been regular. Sleep. Eat. School. Work, and some Play. 2007 crept up quietly behind my back, until of course, February came along! That's when my babe and I got to go to the Cayman Islands. Damn, it was beautiful! Luxurious, and deliciously hot. ;) After that experience, I feel like I'll be missing white sandy beaches forever. Even just talking about it makes me sigh. The food was great, the atmosphere was great, everything was awesome. I guess the only thing really missing from the trip was a marriage proposal. HAHA. In my wildest dreams...

In March, I became a godparent for the first time ever. It was flattering, and a totally different experience all at the same time. I'm not Catholic, so, I'm not aware of all the practices that goes on in the church, I didn't even know what to do! Thank goodness there wasn't really much to do.

Oh, 2007 has also been the worst with regards to my dental expenses. In January I had a wisdom tooth extracted, which left me pretty much out of commission for a good 2 weeks, I'm only disappointed that I only lost 2 pounds. (It felt like I was supposed to lose 10 pounds because all I could eat was soup, literally.) Then last month I had to get a root canal, which by the way, is worse than having an extraction. In the midst of all of this, I had to find a new dentist, because my old one was a complete bimbo. A total of $2,500 is what I'm spending so far on everything that needs to be done. Nice eh?

So, it's hard to not be stressed about money, considering I have a ton of bills to pay. If I'd known I'd be spending so much on my teeth, I wouldn't have bought my laptop in March. Damn.

Honestly, I just want summer to finally be here so I don't have to be so cold, that'll help relieve some stress for sure.

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Friday, October 13, 2006

Zapped...

It's that time of the year again...everyone's getting sick, it's cold, and I'm feeling gloomy. Nice way to start off a blog huh? I'm having one of those days again...or maybe, things just haven't been going so smoothly lately. A lot of things have been going through my mind. I feel like that song, 'LA LA LAND', like I've just gotten a million of my brain cells zapped. I think I'm just about to go insane. I often wonder why things happen the way they do, or why they don't happen. They say everything happens for a reason, but then again, who are 'THEY'? Don't worry, I'm moody, this could all change within a split second.

Lets forget about me for a second...

I wonder how my friend and her family is doing back home. S. was my childhood best friend, and I recently found out from D. (another childhood bestfriend) emailed me with bad news that S.'s younger brother passed away due to complications after having his appendix removed. I was shocked, and I couldn't help but sob. It's unfortunate that these things in life happen...and so the question again, why did this have to happen? What's the reason behind it?

I think I'm due for a spiritual awakening. I haven't gone to church in so long, I can't even remember the last time I was there. I need some reassurance. I need to regain my faith in YOU.

Private section updated.

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